#filters

Despite the trending popularity of #nofilter, we all apply our own filters everyday.

And that doesn't have to be a bad thing. Whether it's the chill one, the silly one, the career-oriented one, or the quiet one, we're different selves around different people simply by design. We only want to show the side of ourselves that is most likely be accepted or will most fit with people's expectations.

So in moderation, these filters are helpful. We use them to protect the people around us from what they might not want to see and to protect ourselves from rejection or shame. We hide our silly sides during interviews so we don't overwhelm potential employers, and we shield our professional selves from friends so we don't look like we take ourselves too seriously. The filters we apply all depend on social context. Establishments decide for us what's permissible to show, and we comply with these standards so as not to stand out and become an easy target for criticism. It's hard to expose the authentic selves we hold so dear to a sometimes savage world.

But these socially imposed standards sometimes cause us to overdo it. Have you ever seen a picture that has been so over-edited that you want to look away? Humans can do that same sort of over-filtering to themselves. It's the crux of all things fake, cliche, or basic. But rather than contempt, we should meet these cliches with empathy. Over-filtering is merely going to further lengths to become more likeable, and we all strive for that. Except with over-filtering, we run the risk of becoming cookies from the same cutter, cakes from the same mold. For the sake of acceptance, we lose the quirks that make us each uniquely individual. We hide a part of ourselves that the world could benefit from. Because the world needs uniqueness. The world needs the new perspectives it offers, the different opinions it encourages, and the innovative approaches it sparks. Each person offers something new, but only if they express themselves as the individuals they are.

It's dangerous that institutions impose these standards, because they not only hurt us, but also damage themselves. By restricting norms to a checklist rubric, institutions drive people to fit themselves into a mold. This results in a culture of exclusivity and uniformity that drives away the valuable perspectives of people who would rather lose out on an opportunity than sacrifice self-expression. It's the root of the gender gap in Silicon Valley; it's the reason why MIT is so special with its wide-ranging diversity of students.

So for the world's sake, we should all strive to be a little bit more of ourselves. No doubt, vulnerability is hard: you have to remove your protective filters to reveal an individual that some might not expect. But it's not really getting rid of your filter; it's just taking it off of yourself and applying it to the world. Instead of filtering yourself for the people around you, filter the world for the people who can handle your uniquely awesome self. 

Vulnerability is difficult, but it can be so worth it. All of the most impactful events in my life have involved making myself vulnerable: to criticism, but also to acceptance. My summer in Singapore gave me the chance to be my authentic self for people from a different culture, and their willingness to accept me was humbling. I was afraid of making my blog public because I didn't want someone to read it and see a Connie they didn't expect. I didn't want to release my private opinions to a public that might not agree, or worse, think they weren't worth anything. But it was so fulfilling to hear friends and strangers alike accept and resonate with a self that I usually conceal. The fear of feeling worthless often keeps us from being vulnerable, but being vulnerable is the best way to realize your self-worth.

These acts of vulnerability gave me a new love for humanity. To see how willing people are to accept the authentic me made me value the incredible human-ness of being understood. No other animal can understand and empathize with each other in the same way that humans can, and that makes showing yourself in all your quirky, dimensioned, unique individuality so beautiful.

Vulnerability is the new #nofilter. Join the trend?